It’s your kid’s second birthday, and at the eleventh hour, your pug puppy pounces on top of the cake smooshing the whole thing. You’re furious, but one at this jokey pug, wearing a party hat with ribbons ‘round his neck leaves you laughing out loud. This pug just set up the most insane and weirdest dog joke and brought alive the whole party. And the best part, the kid’s giggles show how it amused your children!
Thats right, start laughing cause we collected over 60 Clean Dog Jokes your can tell your whole family! What happened when the dog went to the flea circus? He stole the show! Ha! Did you love our funny clean cat jokes? Do you love dogs? Do you love Jokes? Does your friend keep says “Whats UpDog’ and you want a great dog one-liner to throw back at them? Well then your in luck! We've got you covered with the best dog knock-knock jokes, clean dog puns, dog fart jokes, dog dad jokes, dog Halloween jokes, Christmas jokes, one liners, heck we’ve got em all!
THIS PAGE CONTAINS:
INTRO
OVER 60 PUG JOKES
PUG JOKE E-CARDS
ARTICLE ON WHAT MAKES A JOKE FUNNY
Pug Jokes
Pug Riddles
Pug One Liners
Bad Dad Jokes
How do you stop a dog from barking in the back seat while your driving?
Tell him to come bark in the front seat!
DOG JOKES INTRO
These dog jokes are actually funny. Well, most of them are pretty stupid but that doesnt mean we dont love them!
So it’s no surprise that kids, toddlers, and teens enjoy dog jokes more than anyone else. And why not? Funny dog jokes bring smiles to faces and add laughter to our kid's life. But dog jokes aren’t just for kids. These one liners and knock knock jokes are great for adults too. There are even bad dad jokes for the old fart in your family! The funniest dog jokes are here are truly rib-ticklers that can make you laugh and are actually funny jokes!!!
DOG JOKES LIKE
Q: What does my Dog and my phone have in common?
A: They both have collar id!
If you are looking for some new dog jokes that your kids have never heard before, you have landed in the right place. Our collection of over 60 funny dog jokes for kids will make your laugh even louder. Read till the end and let us know the one you think is the funniest of all.
Caution: Joke #58 might take hours for you to get back to normal. Haha!
Let's begin!
Over 60 Clean Dog Jokes For Kids!
Q: Why aren’t there more famous dog dancers?
A: Cause dogs have two left feet!
Q: What has 4,000 eyes and 8,000 legs?
A: Two thousand dogs.
Since my dogs is getting old, I'm gonna start calling him GranPAW.
Q: What do you get when you cross a Doberman and a hyena?
A: No idea, but if it laughs, I join in.
In what month do dogs bark the least?
February, its the shortest month!
What do scientist dogs do with bones?
BARIUM!
DOG DRIVING JOKE:
Why did the dog sleep under a car?
Cause he wanted to wake up oily!
Q: How do you stop a dog from barking in the back seat while your driving?
A: Tell him to come bark in the front seat!
DOG DAD JOKES
Why can’t dogs watch movies at home?
They always hit the paws button!
How do dogs eat spaghetti?
The same way everyone else does, they put it in their mouths!
Q: What happened when the dog went to the flea circus?
A: He stole the show!
Hilarious Clean Dog Jokes Only At PugJokes.Com
Q:Why do Dobermans hate the rain?
A: They dont want to step in a poodle!
Q:What did the dog say to the garden?
A: Lettuce Eat!
How did the dog get first prize at the baking competition?
He just reached up on the table and at it!
DOG VERSUS CAT JOKES
Q: What time is it when ten dogs chase a cat?
A: Ten After One.
Q: What happened when the cat won the dog beauty contest?
A: a Cat-has-trophy!
What's worse than raining cats and dogs?
Hailing taxi cabs!
Q: What does my dog and my phone have in common?
A: They both have collar id!
Q:What kind of dog eats with their ears?
A: They all do! Who removes their ears before dinner?
Q: What do you call a cold Chihauhau?
A: A pupsicle!
Q: How do you spell Dog backwards?
A: D-O-G-B-A-C-K-W-A-R-D-S
Q: What happened when the dog swallowed a firefly?
A: He smiled with de-light!
Q: Why dont dogs bark at their feet?
A: Because its not polite to talk back to your Paw!
pugkinspice
Q: What is my dogs favorite comedian?
A: Growlcho Marx!
DOG ONE LINERS:
What an amazing, clever dog we have! He brings in the paper every morning, and we’ve never even subscribed to one!
A Pug farted on an elevator and it was wrong on so many levels!
My dogs been having a bad day I asked him “hows life?” and all he said was its “RUFF”
MORE CLEAN DOG JOKES:
A three legged dog walks into a bar.
He says, “Im lookin for the man who shot my paw!”
Q: Why did the dog cross the road?
A: To get to the Barking Lot!
More Funny Clean Dog Jokes!
Q: Whats large grey and makes no difference to dogs? "
A: Never mind, it’s irrelliphant!
A pug owner comes home from the international market and says “hey boy! you want a Brazilian treat?” The pug replies “Oh Gosh! Im so lucky! How many is a Brazilion?!?”
Q: Why do Dog Vampires believe everything you tell them?
A: Because their suckers!
Q: Why dont dogs write with dull pencils?
A: Because there’s no point!
Q: Why shouldnt you bring your farty dog to an Apple store?
A: Because they dont have windows!
Q: What do dogs call empty jars of cheese whiz?
A: Cheese Was
Q: Who’s bigger: Mr. Bigger the Pug, or Mr. Bigger’s baby?
A: The baby, cause she’s a little bigger!
Q: Would you rather have a 250 pound dog chase you or a psycho with a chainsaw?
A: thats easy… I’d rather he chased the psycho!
Great gift for kids.
Over 300 five star reviews.
FAT DOG JOKE
I took my dog to the vet. She said “He’s a little overweight” I said I wanted a second opinion. She replied “He’s also pretty cute”
My dog is in shape unfortunately its the wrong one!
Q: Whats a dog’s favorite musical instrument?
A: The dinner bell!
Q: Why was the dog chasing its own tail?
A: It was just trying to make ends meet.
At a dinner party a Pug farts. The king charles turns to him and says “How dare you fart in front of me!” The pug replies “Im sorry, I didnt realize it was your turn!”
Why did the dog roll toilet paper down the hill?
So it could get to the bottom!
pug mayhen in the bathtub!
Q: Why do dog farts smell?
A: For the benefit of the people who are hearing impaired!
Two dogs are sittin on opposite sides of a lake. One dog yells “HEY! How do I get to the other side of the lake?!” The second dog yells back “You ARE on the other side!”
A dog breeder has 196 dog in his back yard. But when he rounded them up, he had 200!
“Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain’t the lead dog, the scenery never changes. ” - Lewis Grizzard
If you like dog jokes, try these funny cat jokes on your friends!
Q: What do you call a sleeping Rottweiler?
A: Anything you like, just very quietly.
Q: How do you tell the difference between a labrador and a marine biologist?
A: The one wags a tale, the other tags a whale.
Q: What do you do when you find a 250 pound dog sleeping on your bed?
A: Quietly go sleep on the sofa.
What is the difference between a dog and a grocery store? [Don’t know] Hmmm, guess I’ll go do the shopping myself then!
Q: Why don’t people put an ad online when their dogs get lost?
A: well, how many dogs do you know that actually use the internet?
Q: What do you get when you cross a pitbull with a computer?
A: Lots of Bytes!
Q: Did you hear about the dog who invented the knock knock joke?
A: She won the no-bell prize!
Dog riddles, dog humor, talking dog jokes, dog puns, dog phrases dog one liners, dog funny pictures... What do you call a dog with no legs?
SCROLL DOWN AND LEAVE A COMMENT!
OR LET US KNOW YOUR FAVORITE DOG JOKE
ANATOMY OF A CLEAN DOG JOKE
Kids love Dogs. If there is one thing they love more than Dogs, its clean funny dog jokes!
Speaking of jokes, we compiled some of the best dog jokes on the internet above but we also wanted to break down the types of jokes we have. Let’s pretend for a moment that your a “joke beginner”, so were going to take apart the basics of all the different types of dog jokes out there.
THE KNOCK KNOCK DOG JOKE
The knock knock joke is when one person starts with saying “knock knock”. It is an audience participatory jokes that ends with a pun. So one person is saying knock knock to get a response from the other person. Its making fun of the idea that you the joke teller is knocking on a door and your friend is answering the call.
Example of a Dog knock-knock joke:
Knock Knock
Whose There?
Here?
Here Who?
I can’t HEAR you because your dog is barking too much!
THE DOG RIDDLE
A riddle is a type of question or statement that has a double meaning. The most famous riddle is “What’s black and white and red all over?” “A newspaper!” There aren’t a lot of Dog related riddles, but we made some up just for you guys:
DOG RIDDLE
If a dog breeder had 199 dogs in his back yard. How many dogs does he have?
Well, when he rounds them up, he has 200 dogs!
THE BAD DAD DOG JOKE
The dad joke is a quick joke that is usually some kind of pun. It is also known as a groaner, because it makes the audience (normal ones children) groan. They are notoriously bad and simple. Bad dad jokes are often one liners and sometimes have a question that is quickly followed by an answer. Most of the dog jokes above are bad dad jokes and do not impress most people! (We are shocked!!!) However, some adults believe that bad dad jokes are actually the “anti-joke” and that they get their humor from having intentionally bad or unfunny endings. Though no one knows who came up with the first dad joke, the term was first used in 1987 in an article titled “Don’t ban the ‘Dad’ jokes; preserve and never them” (Gettysburg Time June 1987).
Example of a Bad Dad Dog Joke
A Dog farted in an elevator.
It was wrong on so many levels.
oooof.
THE ONE LINER DOG JOKE
A one liner is a super short witty remark. It is barely a joke and sometimes are kind of snarky. They are usually concise and meaningful and many people are known for their one liners as a quote or saying. James Bond is a good example of the one liner when he delivers a snarky comment to a villain. Some is a cheesy Dog one liner making fun of a fat dog:
My dog is in shape unfortunately its the wrong one!
THE WAITER DOG JOKE
The waiter joke is an old timer meme. It usually revolves around a customer who comes to a restaurant and gets snarky service from a… you guessed it A WAITER! These jokes are rumored to have their origin from the Lindy’s Restaurant in NY during the 1920’s, where the waiters were notorious for giving snarky remarks. When a fly landed in a customers soup, one Lindy waiter would say “sure there’s a fly in your soup, but how much can he really drink?” Zing!
Waiter jokes have come a long way since the 1920’s and here is my favorite Dog Waiter Joke!
A Dog was shocked that there was a fly in its kibble.
“Waiter Watier! There is a fly in my food bowl!” he yelled.
“Oh, don’t worry” the waiter replied. “The spider in your water dish will get it!”
