Only the best Black Lab jokes. I pulled a bunch of these labrador retriever jokesfrom the web and some I just made up!
Q: What kind of dog does a mad scientist have? A: A Laboratory Retriever!
Q: What happened when the Labrador Retriever went to the flea circus? A: He stole the show!
Q:Why do Black Labs hate the rain? A: They don't want to step in a poodle!
Q: Who’s bigger: Mr. Bigger the Labrador Retriever, or Mr. Bigger’s baby? A: The baby, cause she’s a little bigger!
Q:What did the Labrador Retriever say to the garden? A: Lettuce Eat!
Q: What does a Black Lab and my phone have in common? A: They both have collar id!
Q: What do you call a cold Labrador Retriever? A: A pupsicle!
Q: What happened when the Labrador Retriever swallowed a firefly? A: He smiled with de-light!
Q: Why dont Black Labs bark at their feet? A: Because its not polite to talk back to your Paw!
Q: Whats a Labrador Retriever favorite comedian? A: Growlcho Marx!
A three legged Labrador Retriever walks into a bar. He says, “Im lookin for the man who shot my paw!”
Q: What happened when the cat won the Black Lab beauty contest? A: a Cat-has-trophy!
Q: Why did the Labrador Retriever cross the road? A: To get to the Barking Lot!
A Black Lab farted on an elevator, it was wrong on so many levels!
Q: Whats large grey and makes no difference to Labrador Retrievers? A: Never mind, it’s irrelliphant!
Q: Did you hear the Black Lab pizza joke? A: Never mind, it’s too cheesy!
A Labrador Retriever owner comes home from the international market and says “hey boy! you want a Brazilian treat?” The Lab replies “Oh Gosh! Im so lucky! How many is a Brazilion?!?”
(Best Yellow Lab Dog Joke Meme)
Q: Why do Labrador Retriever Vampires believe everything you tell them? A: Because their suckers!
Q: Why dont Labrador Retrievers write with dull pencils? A: Because there’s no point!
Q: What do Black Labs call empty jars of cheese whiz? A: Cheese Was
I took my Labrador Retriever to the vet. She said “He’s a little over weight” I said I wanted a second opinion. She replied “He’s got a lovely coat”
Q: Whats a Labrador Retriever favorite musical instrument? A: The dinner bell!
Q: Did you hear about the Lab who invented the knock knock joke? A: She won the no-bell prize!
(Best Black Lab Dog Joke Meme)
At a dinner party aLabrador Retriever farts. The Pug turns to him and says “How dare you fart in front of me!” The Lab replies “Im sorry, I didnt realize it was your turn!”
Why did the Black Lab roll toilet paper down the hill? So it could get to the bottom!
Q: Why do Labrador Retriever farts smell? A: For the benefit of the people who are hearing impaired!
Two Labrador Retrievers are sitting on opposite sides of a lake. One yells “HEY! How do I get to the other side of the lake?!” The second Lab yells back “You ARE on the other side!”
A Labrador Retriever breeder has 196 Lab puppies in his field. But when he rounded them up, he had 200!
A guy is driving around Oklahoma and he sees a sign in front of a house: "Talking Dog For Sale." He rings the bell and the owner tells him the dog is in the backyard. The guy goes into the backyard and sees a Labrador Retriever sitting there.
"You talk?" he asks. "Yep," the Lab replies. "So, what's your story?"
The Lab looks up and says, "Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA about my gift, and in no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping. I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running.
"But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security wandering near suspicious characters and listening in.
"I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals. I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired."
The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.
"Ten dollars," the guy says.
"Ten dollars? This dog is amazing. Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?"
"Because he's a damn liar. He never did any of that stuff."
A woman brings her parrot to the vet. The parrot is stiff and lifeless.
"I'm sorry ma'am, but this parrot is dead"
"How can you tell so quickly?" replies the woman, "Isn't there a way to be absolutely certain?"
So, the vet whistles and a beautiful black Labrador Retriever walks in the examining room. The Lab sniffs around the parrot for a few moments, then looks at the vet with sad eyes and shakes his head.
"A dog shakes its head and I'm supposed to believe that?!" cries the woman. "You're going to have to do more to prove that my poor parrot is dead!"
So the vet leaves momentarily, comes back with a cat and puts it on the table beside the parrot. The cat looks closely at the parrot, walks around it, prods it a bit, then shakes his head and jumps off the table.
Finally, the woman seems convinced. As she turns for the door, the vet announces that she owes him $500.
"$500?!" the woman asks. "How in the world could it be that much just to tell me my parrot is dead?"
"Well, it would have been a lot cheaper, but with that lab report and cat scan..."
(Black Lab Puppy Joke Meme)